Putting Our Minds To It

Time sure flies.

As I’m nearing the end of my six months period here, I realised that a lot can be accomplished if we really put our minds to it. But of course, EVERYBODY knows that.. But why is it that not many people actually do it?

Invent a new toy..
Conduct a ground-breaking research..
Write an award-winning play..
Compose a symphony that puts Mozart to shame..
Complete that job on time..
Find a cure for cancer (ok, scrap this one. I’m sure many doctors and scientists are frantically working on this)

When I first got here, I received quite a lot of flak from ‘the others’ -those conventional PhD students, or researchers as they proudly call themselves (for the record, I don’t mind being labelled a ‘student’ because that’s what I am and I will always be one in this field). Without batting an eyelash, they immediately laughed off my intention to produce a complete research design before going home.

“Enam bulan, apa sempat?”
“Eh saya kat sini nak dekat setahun, apa pun takde lagi..”
“Biasanya dalam first year ni memang terumbang-ambing lah.. mencari-cari idea..”
“Apa sempat buat enam bulan??”

Talk about motivation.

I guess the only thing that stopped me from shedding to tears is the thought of leaving my family only to return home with a cargo full of carboot stuffs. Adamant not to be useless, I wanted to make this work. Not so much to show ‘the others’ that they are wrong, heck I don’t even care if they know me or not after this.. I’m doing this for myself. For my family. For us.

I want to know what my full potential is. I often hear that a PhD is not so much a test of intellectuality but it is more of a test of endurance. If going through labour isn’t enduring enough, this is one test I’m bracing myself for. With His blessing and my family’s support, I hope I can do it. Insya-Allah.


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